Feeling sorry for myself

My baby, I am sorry I know the last few posts have been a bit on the sad side. It is only the strength of my feelings for you and my complete confusion. I have been thinking more and more about what to do. In some ways I should just be happy that you exist and that your mum must presumably be sorting herself out, but I suppose I really had such hopes or our future as a family when I had no right to expect that. Forgive me, I am going to be more positive. Well at least I am going to try. I love you